Finding a Mentor

Finding a Mentor

By Pauline Bell

If you have downloaded our e-book on “who is at your table” you can see that the “king/queen” energy is represented well by a mentor (a high functioning mentor!). Here at LS we think it really important to have mentors as we transition through life. As we change, as do our mentors.

We are incredibly lucky to share some insight here from Pauline Bell from Mentoring Mix who brings a wealth of knowledge in mentorship.

How to find a great mentor?
"Mentoring is to support and encourage people to manage their own learning in order that they may maximise their potential, develop their skills, improve their performance and become the person they want to be." Eric Parsloe, The Oxford School of Coaching & Mentoring.

It is vital to get your mentoring relationship off to a good start and for the mentee to own the relationship. It is important for the mentee to set their goals and objectives regarding what they wish to achieve from mentoring and discuss with their mentor at the first meeting.

On average a mentoring relationship will last for one year minimum and it is important to agree this at the first meeting along with how often and where you are going to meet.  Discussing ground rules, in particular confidentiality, at this stage is key to building trust.

How to find your mentor?
More and more organisations are recognising the value of in house mentoring programmes and are having bespoke programmes designed incorporating their company specific needs.

If in business for yourself there are online options and various charities who run programmes for self employed people. However you can be proactive yourself while networking and look out for your own mentor.

High rapport and high clarity of purpose are 2 key elements for getting off to a good start. Being friendly or too familiar with your mentor is not a good idea. You wish to share open dialogue, shared expectations, openness to mutual benefit and a sense of urgency.

David Clutterbuck has excellent research on this topic.

One of my mentees said;
“A good match is to be with someone who has knowledge and experience to learn from. Someone you can really connect with. You’re telling them really intimate things so you have to feel really comfortable in the relationship.”

It is not essential to be within the same sector as a good mentor as they will be mainly listening to you and opening your mind to find your answers and can often signpost you to somebody in their network for factual, specific knowledge if required.

Mentoring is a 2 way process with the mentor learning as much as the mentee. The additional benefits for the mentor can be:

  • Personal fulfilment from investing in others
  • Communication, mentoring and coaching skills
  • Enjoyment from seeing others succeed
  • Feels ‘valued’ as a role model
  • Stimulates own learning of business
  • Opportunity to take time out and reflect
  • Renewed focus on future career or opportunities
  • Develops new insight into own self
  • Gains an appreciation of others pressures
  • Improves own development and performance


More than anything, mentoring is a gift.  You can give someone the gift of seeing their own potential.

Pauline Bell >


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“Mentoring is a brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction”.

~John C Crosby

It is not essential to be within the same sector as a good mentor as they will be mainly listening to you and opening your mind to find your answers and can often signpost you to somebody in their network for factual, specific knowledge if required.

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